Well, my love, I'm trying to make sense of things

...of how I was, and how I am now.I have always believed our first duty is to ourselves...to live life to the full. But I have also been haunted by another conviction...that everything is preordained, lying in wait....Simultaneously I was reading an old conversation with my dear Soshini, and she once sent me this blurb...Seeing yourself clearly isn't easy. It's like when you get really close to an Impressionist painting and all you see are the little teeny dots of color. You can pick out a few key details, but you need some distance in order to see the big picture. My past few weeks from NYC to Cali to work again and then a trip back to Scrantabama to see what was new and different and I am still cruising along. Life is not dull to say the least and my time has been well spent with the old, the new, and...the future friends who keep appearing in my life out of nowhere. I look into my cell phone and am like...where'd all these new numbers come from recently? Thinking back to a few nights I clearly thought I was hallucinating. How can I best see these little dots and dabs that is my life? Pictures! And thats where the warm and fuzzy friends do indeed come in. The paparazzi always strike at the right time...we've had enough practice with taking just the right kodak moments. There are some classic intimate pics. I'll potentially put them up with consultation, but I think the internet might malfunction and decombust because they are just TOO HOT to handle.

And well, another close friend got engaged this past weekend. This makes two, oddly enough the wedding plans are within one month of each other. I on the other hand am loving the single life as always. I did have an interesting conversation with my Mom tonight as I was driving her to work. She stated that she will definitely cry at my wedding, unless I marry a Polish guy and get stuck with a loooong unpronouncable last name, and then she will laugh at the wedding instead. She's all proud because she lost her long complicated name and got a German one when she got married. Well Ma no worries about this yet. I'm still concentrating on which VIP list I can get on to and where to plan the next getaway with my gals and guys who are about living up our youthful days with joy and merryment, and a bit of insanity along the way.