you feel like you're going where you've gone before

Drip drip drip I hear rain and I'm sitting at home on a Friday night because there were actually too many options tonight and I decided me and my pillow would be truly the best way to unwind.

work is keeping me...occupied, amongst other things and I'm learning how to speed dial and even make decisions for people who ought to know way more medical stuff than me.

i will not vent about work, this is not what the weekend is for.

i will perhaps vent about my inability to put the past behind me.

The Past is a good thing, i like The Past. see looking back I can honestly figure out and understand myself a heck of a lot better than present. i never really get why i do what i do presently, but in my hindsight it can be pieced together. sort of.

but just this week The Past, from sophomore year of college (THREE years ago if you do the math), has come back to reinvent intself in my present and not only had it requested a readmission in my so called life i think it wants come commitment or something. it also knows exactly what i am not capable of, so why did it ask?? why now? and have either of us changed enough to even let this come across as a possibility?



in comes the tune of coldplay...

Oh brother I can't,
I can't get through
I’ve been trying hard to reach you
'cause I don’t know what to do
Oh brother I can't believe it's true
I’m so scared about the future and
I wanna talk to you
Oh I wanna talk to you

You can take a picture of something you see
In the future where will I be?
You can climb a ladder up to the sun
Or write a song nobody has sung
Or do something that's never been done (antarctica!)
Are you lost or incomplete?
Do you feel like a puzzle, you can't find your missing piece?
Tell me how you feel?
Well I feel like they're talking in a language I don't speak (japanese, russian and australian accents are HARD to understand)
And they're talking it to me
So you take a picture of something you see
In the future where will I be?
You can climb a ladder up to the sun
Or write a song nobody has sung
Or do something that's never been done
Or do something that's never been done
So you don't know where you're going and you wanna talk
And you feel like you're going where you've been before
You tell anyone who'll listen but you feel ignored
Nothing's really making any sense at all,
let's talkLet's talk, let's talk, let's talk.

By the way I thought The Devil and Angel were tricky enough to handle, now I have the whole United Nations to deal with.