how do you throw it back in?
If you think that life is stressful or confusing in your teens, the early twenties aren't times of super security either. Things that once make you happy require so much more, because you've lived so much more and you know so much more. I'm either caught up in this quiet desperation that I may never be truly understood, or I'm out being baffled by yet another event that has swung around, completely out of my peripheral vision, and into a karmachasmic cycle.
demand more?
i'd like to...if i knew it wasnt in vain. things start off well. and then it fades. and its not really a badly tragic thing. i don't lose sleep over it. i lose sleep over staying out all night. and so when one lives life in action rather than waiting, moving on is going to happen constantly over and over again, unless you pick up someone along the way that just plane sticks. where's the superglue?
i'm strongly under the impression that the truth is, most of us walk around with a preassumption that we already found glue that holds the pieces together, and that the particular piece we need is just waiting to get attached. because if we were more concerned about finding that piece and making sure it would stick around we'd be making a more resolved and clear cut step process to get that piece. however, the truth is, its not. the piece has a mind of its own and isnt going to stick around for anybody but herself, until she finally realizes, after years of starring in the three-ring circus of her so-called-life, hopping around puzzle after puzzle dancing to the beat of some clubheads track that if you really want ONE significant other you would close down your webshots that are filled with ghosts from the past, stop being shady, prevent all unecessary worlds from colliding, seriously take out ALL the other distractions from your cell phone, and settle down.
someday, i will demand more.
from myself.
and you'll follow through.
but for now....
work is good. its the one place im starting to learn to really predict things...i know what the doctors will order before they order it...i know when pharmacy will forget things...
and paul van dyk was another energy booster this weekend (not really an energy drainer, though i danced all night and didnt sleep for 24 hrs or so...).
demand more?
i'd like to...if i knew it wasnt in vain. things start off well. and then it fades. and its not really a badly tragic thing. i don't lose sleep over it. i lose sleep over staying out all night. and so when one lives life in action rather than waiting, moving on is going to happen constantly over and over again, unless you pick up someone along the way that just plane sticks. where's the superglue?
i'm strongly under the impression that the truth is, most of us walk around with a preassumption that we already found glue that holds the pieces together, and that the particular piece we need is just waiting to get attached. because if we were more concerned about finding that piece and making sure it would stick around we'd be making a more resolved and clear cut step process to get that piece. however, the truth is, its not. the piece has a mind of its own and isnt going to stick around for anybody but herself, until she finally realizes, after years of starring in the three-ring circus of her so-called-life, hopping around puzzle after puzzle dancing to the beat of some clubheads track that if you really want ONE significant other you would close down your webshots that are filled with ghosts from the past, stop being shady, prevent all unecessary worlds from colliding, seriously take out ALL the other distractions from your cell phone, and settle down.
someday, i will demand more.
from myself.
and you'll follow through.
but for now....
work is good. its the one place im starting to learn to really predict things...i know what the doctors will order before they order it...i know when pharmacy will forget things...
and paul van dyk was another energy booster this weekend (not really an energy drainer, though i danced all night and didnt sleep for 24 hrs or so...).
posted by Nateration @ 8:35 PM
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